31 Day Reset Challenge - Day 13

I'm a little bit behind, but here's Day 13. The task was to come up with 100 things that make us happy. Here's my list, in no particular order:

1. Trashy television
2. Sugar cookies
3. Massages
4. Unbridled laughter
5. Writing
6. Composition notebooks
7. Sarcasm
8. My parents
9. Jon Hamm
10. Steak
11. Jalapeno hot sauce (and jalapenos in general)
12. My officemates
13. Violent make-out sessions
14. Blogging
15. San Francisco weather
16. The Yankees
17. Lemonade
18. Talking about sex
19. Obsessive use of Foursquare
20. Twitter
21. Blow jobs (I'm just keeping it real, ya'll...)
22. Spending entire days in bed
23. My DVR
24. gChat
25. Making lists
26. Dancing
27. Lady Gaga
28. Glee
29. Being obsessed with Criminal Minds
30. The MCM
31. Technology
32. Being snarky
33. Natural hair
34. Boot camps
35. Long walks
36. Ferry rides
37. Mexican food
38. Books
39. History Channel specials
40. Smiles from cute strangers
41. Alcatraz tours
42. Finding money in old purses
43. The color yellow
44. Kittens/cats
45. The Chappelle Show
46. Live comedy shows
47. Alcohol
48. Cleavage
49. Being by the water
50. This video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCK7njbgDO8&feature=player_embedded
51. Jeopardy
52. Word games
53. Late nights in New York
54. Soy Caramel Macchiatos 
55. Russian culture
56. Love Actually
57. Making up nicknames for all my friends
58. Spooning
59. Mani/pedis
60. Minneola Tangelos 
61. Candy
62. Jezebel.com
63. Laura Ingalls Wilder books
64. Feminism
65. Intelligence
66. The made-up language that Jammerz and I use
67. New York pizza and bagels
68. Doing my job well
69. Volleyball
70. Boston-New York rivalries
71. Bourbon and Branch
72. Getting hammered on work nights
73. My alma mater
74. Day drinking
75. Android cell phones
76. Eucerin lotion (haha, I have dry skin)
77. My sorority sisters
78. Everyone who comments on my blog
79. Being "one of the guys"
80. Fancy dresses
81. White House Black Market
82. Exploring other cultures
83. Old school animated Christmas specials
84. Church hymns
85. Witty banter
86. Musical theater
87. Nostalgia
88. Spearmint candy canes
89. Riesling
90. White Russians
91. Movie theaters
92. Geeky fantasy novels
93. Inappropriate comments
94. A man with a good sense of humor
95. Adoption
96. This video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UehSJlOQj2I
97. Autumn leaves
98. Easter sunday dinner
99. Black Twitter
100. Waking up early

31 Day Reset Challenge - Day 9

I'm back on the challenge! I've been a little behind, but I'm on Day 9 and figured I'd take some time to blog about it. The challenge (from yesterday) was to do one thing in order to further a goal you have. I decided to focus on my goal to be a world-famous, fabulous blogger =) Okay... maybe not world famous, but I definitely want to take this blogging thing to the next level - more interaction, more readers, better content.

So today, I've joined 20 Something Bloggers in the hopes of getting some feedback on this site, as well as connecting with other bloggers. In addition to that, I have some awesome regular readers who comment here a lot and I want to spread the love to their blogs as well. So I'll be adding a bunch of new feeds to my reader. I also started a Twitter account - you can find me on www.twitter.com/pillowtkisextra! Lastly, but not least-ly (hehe), I ordered a new blog design from Utterly Chaotic Designs (thanks for the recommendation - Late to the Party and MommaSkinnyJeans)! Okay, I know that that's not one thing, but what can I say - I'm an overachiever!

I really enjoyed this exercise - I've been blogging for such a long time (7 years, ya'll!) and I really want to start being a larger part of the blog community - sharing my writing, experiences, and works with others. I have no idea where the hell all this will lead, but I want to take the necessary steps to make this hobby something more!

31 Day Reset Challenge - Day 5

I am so behind on this! It's overwhelming, but I think it's necessary and useful to my personal growth so I'm going to try my darnedest to catch up!

Day 5: Write a personal mission statement.
So the goal here is to write a statement that takes into account all of the values from Day 3 and gives you a concise summary of what you want in your life and who you want to be. Mine is the following:

I will strive to live a life of passion and dynamic change - a life in which I pursue my interests and desires, never being afraid to step outside of my comfort zone. I will be strong enough to travel my path alone, but open enough to embrace and accept the love and friendship that others offer me on my journey. I will search for a real career path, something that I love to do, a job that I will be excited to wake up for each morning. When I lose that passion and that flame, I will move on to the next phase in my life. I want to ensure that I always balance my career with "me time" and the chance to blow off steam with some friends. I love alcohol and entertaining and being social and that should balance out the time I spend at work. I will use my organization skills and OCD tendencies to streamline my life and my finances. I want to live a life of joy and happiness - making other people laugh and laughing at myself. I will seek out knowledge - taking classes, reading books, and soaking up whatever new information I can get my hands on. I will always stress the need for balance in my life, remembering that you need the sour to appreciate the sweet. I will never take any experience for granted, even a bad one because all experiences are opportunities for learning and growth.

31 Day Reset Challenge - Day 3

Today, the challenge asked us to pick our Top 10 values and list them. This was really hard for me, actually. I had a list of about 20 when I did my brainstorm and narrowing them down was difficult. I did learn something about myself, though, when I looked at what I had to cut out. I think I may have even learned more by what I didn't include than what I did. When I did my first Top 10, absolutely nothing I wrote had anything to do with family or friends or love. I know I joke around about being an ice queen, but maybe there's more truth to it than I thought. Then I really started to look at my life and the things that have really sustained me and while love is definitely not on my list, friendship was something that just had to be there. I'd be nothing without my friends, for real. So here's my list (in no particular order):

1. Financial security: This is what I've been striving for my whole life - having enough money to live the life I want. I don't need to be filthy rich (although I certainly wouldn't turn it down), but I want to know that I will always be able to provide for myself and my family. 
2. Intelligence: I am an intellectual snob. I love knowledge and learning and I have a special place in my heart for geeks. I like learning useless facts for trivia and I love reading about things I don't know and trying to beef up my knowledge factor.
3. Passion: I don't like to do things half-ass, so I don't. If I don't want to do something, it's most likely just not going to get done. I went to a palm reader once because I was curious why I have a line going all the way across my palm (I've only met one other person with the same palm line). She told me it was because I needed to be fully invested in everything I do, that I needed to be passionate about the things I get involved in or else I can't function. She's 100% correct - I need passion to feel complete.
4. Balance: I think this is one of the most important things in life. I always want to make sure that I'm completely balanced and that nothing is off-kilter. I need the yin and the yang to feel like my life is going well.
5. Independence: I don't like relying on anyone for anything - it's too easy to be disappointed. Instead, I strive to always support myself in all that I do and to be emotionally strong enough to handle what life throws my way without any assistance. I know this isn't 100% possible, but I don't ever want to feel like I'm depending on someone else to live my life.
6. Ability to laugh at life: I laugh at everything, even shit I shouldn't laugh at. I don't know if it's a black thing - we love our humor! - but I just like finding the funny in everything around us. I believe that there's no situation that can't be lightened by a funny joke or a witty comment. The day I stop laughing is when I'll know that life is no longer worth living.
7. Organization: I have serious OCD. I mean it. I make lists like a crazy person about shit that people shouldn't make lists for. Fuck cleanliness, organization is next to godliness for me. I like feeling like my life is in order.
8. Ability to accept and embrace change: I have a huge boner for change - I love it. It forces you to grow, makes you flexible and teaches you that nothing in life is permanent. Anytime I have a chance to do something different, I take it. It's never steered me in the wrong direction because I've always learned something from it.
9. Learning about other cultures: I love learning about groups that are different from my own. I'm a half-black, half-Puerto Rican chick, but I'm obsessed with Russian culture and I was in Asian club for all my years in high school. I'm constantly trying to learn more about the world and other people's customs. 
10. Friendship: If nothing else, I hope people think I'm a good friend. My friends are my lifeline and they sustain me when I don't have anything else to hold onto. So I try to do my best to stay connected and to be there when people need me.

31 Day Reset Challenge - Day 2

Yes, yes, folks - I'm doing another 30ish day challenge! I'm really excited about this one, though. It's being run by @HappyBlackWoman who I've been following on Twitter and whose blog I've been reading since this summer. Basically, it's a chance to do some pre-work before all those New Years resolutions. A time of reflection, renewal, and recharging for the year ahead. For more information, you can peep the challenge info here. Today's exercise is to conduct a life assessment, something I'm constantly doing in my head and in my various docs, but haven't really formalized. So here goes, I'll be evaluating what I love and hate about these 7 areas of my life:

• Lifestyle
• Work
• Education
• Finances
• Health
• Family
• Relationships

Here goes!

Lifestyle: Moving to San Francisco this August was the best decision I've made in a long time. I feel at home here and I'm loving living by myself. I love my apartment, it's got tons of space and it's all mine. I hate that I haven't decorated or really put my mark on the place. I hate that I don't cook at all and instead eat 3 meals a day at my job. It makes me feel like I'm not a real adult. I hate that I haven't bought nice pots and pans or cookware and that I don't have "adult" things. I have nice furniture, but I haven't put any artwork up or really gone about making my place look homey.

Work: I love where I work - my company is young, vibrant, and full of talented and smart people. I love the opportunities they've given me and the things they do. I love my team and my manager - they're amazing people who make going to work fun and I honestly think the only reason I've done this job as long as I have is because of them. What I hate is that I feel lost in my career and I feel like I'm doing something that's not really meant for me. I fell into HR by accident - it was supposed to be a stopover until I started doing what I thought I was meant to do - being an attorney. Instead, I decided the law wasn't for me and I just stayed in my current place, without thinking about what I really wanted to do. I grew complacent and stagnant and those are two qualities I can't stand. I'm starting to get out of that funk, but I still hate that I have no concrete plan for my future. I don't do well with not having a plan.

Education: I love the fact that my parents sacrificed a lot for me to attend my alma mater. I fully acknowledge that if it weren't for my Ivy League education, I probably wouldn't be working where I am today with all the opportunities I have. I am grateful for everything my parents did to get me there, as well as my own part in studying and working hard and being intellectually curious. However, I do hate that I haven't pursued a higher degree. For a long time I wanted to be a lawyer, but I realized that that's not the path for me. I do think, though, that I need to get some more education, hopefully an MBA. I also  have a strong desire to get involved in the sex education business and I know that in order to do that, I need to get certified and take classes. I just hope I never stop learning, whether it's from the classroom, reading on my own time, or researching the things I'm interested in.

Finances: Anyone who knows me knows that I suck at money. My finances are a hot ass mess, which is a goddamn shame because I have a steady, well-paying job but apparently I don't have any sense. I love that I have the money to live the lifestyle I like. I hate that I can't seem to save money for anything and that I'm not as stable in the long-term as someone in my situation should be. This is one area with huge red flags all over it - I need to fix my money quickly because you never know what could happen, especially in this economy.

Health: Another "area for development." I love that I have such a solid grip on my emotions and my inner mental growth - I'm incredibly introspective and I try to reason out all of my feelings so I know what's going on in my head. My spiritual health could probably use some work, but I don't know if I'm ready to tackle that yet. What I hate is that I'm not 100% satisfied with my physical fitness. It's not as much about my weight, it's more the fact that I used to be super athletic and now I've just kind of stopped doing anything physical at all. I miss feeling like my body could do anything - walking a half-marathon, playing a game of volleyball, doing a boot camp. I want to feel that again. I need to really look at what I'm putting into my body and maybe swap out some of the booze for some fruits and veggies. I love living the drunken, party girl lifestyle, but one day it's going to catch up with me and it will not be pretty. 

Family: I love that I have such a supportive family - my mother, father, and three brothers. We're a pretty close bunch and we're all a bunch of characters. Our loud, New York personalities make going home for the holidays a blast. What I hate is that the distance makes it so difficult for me to communicate with them regularly. I live in SF and they're all in NY. I work a demanding job, so by the time I get home, it's like 10pm their time and my geriatric parents are already asleep. I hate that I'm not patient with them - that I snap at my mother and ignore her calls and texts sometimes because she'll contact me at inconvenient times. I wish I could be a little bit kinder with them, realizing that it's hard to have your only daughter 3,000 miles away from you.

Relationships: I love that I have a ton of amazing friends and that they're family to me at this point. I love that I still spend every day talking to three people I met in the 7th grade. I love that I've made excellent work friends that I can party with, share secrets with, and laugh with. I love that after 25 years of being single, I've finally found a boyfriend. For the hate side of this coin, I'm a bit challenged emotionally. I find it hard to connect to people sometimes, especially men. I'm in this relationship, but sometimes I'm not sure I'm really in it. I get scared and I always want to run away. I need to work on fixing that. I hate that I can't seem to open up to the guys I date and really give them my all, the way I do with my friends.

Wow, that was long, but super productive. I love inspecting my life from all angles, so this was a perfect exercise for me!

Hopefully this challenge will help me grow =)